23 a little too confused and feel like a damn failure
Okay so this is mostly a rant. Like idk why but I had to let it out.
So I’m 23, did BBA, did not get college placements (not too sad about that), did 2 internships, got a full time role as a performance marketer in an agency at 35k. Worked there for a year. Left the job last month as it was getting too hectic. Tried my hands at trading, lost 1-2L there. Have started my own agency with a friend which is working just okayish. Like it’s not giving any returns as we’re mostly focused on getting more clients rn.
But life feels like shit yaar, I feel like I’m way too behind as compared to my friends. Half of them have moved abroad. Some got into very nice colleges like LSE and UBC (in canada), some got very decent jobs like in mckinsey and stuff. Everytime I open Linkedin, some other batch mate of mine is getting promoted, getting a better job, posting from his workstation telling how they are a better person than they were before because they have xyz skill and/or a better degree now. The other half of my friends, I don’t really care about because they aren’t the ones who are going to make it in life. Their life revolves around drinking, hookahs and all other types of nashe.
Here, I’m struggling to get anything in life and there my friends are killing it. I mean I know I’m not supposed to compare but when I see everyone talking about them including my fam, I feel so low and such a failure. I wanted to do masters from abroad like singapore, Netherlands or Canada but it’s just so expensive idk how I’ll pay off the student loan. If i dont get a job there, it’ll be a massive financial burden to my family and since we’re not very wealthy I don’t want to put myself and my family under this kind of debt. I’ve lost my purpose of living and I’m feeling like everyone is way ahead of me. I’m going to be 24 in November and it’s just so fkn pathetic.
My mom was just talking about the friend who got into McKinsey (100k package) and how he sends money home and how they are sorted for life. I could hear the disappointment in her voice. Bro what am I supposed to do? I just want this feeling of failure to not take over me.
I’m really trying to make it yk. I know everyone is trying to do the same and I’m not undermining anyone.